Presidential candidates offer no solutions to Cubs’ failures

I’ve been meaning to share my thoughts (pain) on another collapse by the Cubs.

It’s now becoming a reality that at age 52 that the Cubs may never make the World Series in my life time, let alone win the whole thing. With 1908 being the last Cubs’ championship, this will be the second generation of my family (even if my parents were not rabid fans) that has not seen a Cubs’ win. My grandfather, from Atlantic City, a Phillies fan born in 1895, was 13 the last time the Cubs won it all.

Now we hear that the neither of the presidential candidates has a plan to end the Cub’s failures.

From SNL’s special last night.

Bill Murray, a cub fan appearing as himself in a sketch lampooning the town-hall presidential debate last Tuesday, asked Sen. John McCain (Darrell Hammond) and Sen. Barack Obama (Fred Armisen) what they would do to ensure that the Cubs would never lose in the playoffs again.

Last week, in the National League divisional playoffs, the Chicago Cubs faced the Los Angeles Dodgers. In Game 1, the Cubs lost 7-3. In Game 2, they lost 10-3 and in Game 3, 3-1. What, as president, would you do to guarantee that this never happens again? Senators, in your answers, please be specific.

From Senator Obama:

That’s a fair question, William, but let’s face it, the Cubs may very well be in the playoffs again, perhaps even next year. If so, they will lose again, and they will keep right on losing year after year after year, because that is what the Cubs do. We as a nation have got to wean Cubs fans away from supporting that team and train them to root for other teams – teams that will actually have a chance at winning.

And Senator McCain:

Here I have to agree with my opponent. Let me give you some straight talk, my friends: The Cubs will never win the pennant, much less the World Series! Junior over there, he won’t tell you that. I just did.

There you have it. Obama tells me to start cheering for the Tampa Bay Rays, a team that’s hard to accept being in MLB. And McCain telling me to suck it up.